Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Marriage or Remarriage of Party

I'm getting married. Woo hoo!

I should be out in Napa lasciviously stomping grapes, or at the Starlight Room dancing cheek-to-cheek, or in a bathtub full of bubbles pouring over travel brochures about Tahiti...

But no. I am home drinking sake raking through my TIC agreement.

"15.6 Marriage or Remarriage of Party
In the event a Party marries, re-marries or becomes a domestic partner while this Agreement remains in effect, that Party shall immediately cause his/her new spouse or domestic partner to execute a recordable quitclaim deed in favor of the Party as his/her sole and separate property."

That means as soon at we are joined in matrimony beneath the gold dome of City Hall I must march my new husband over to the Recorder's Office so he can file a paper stating he has no financial interest in the home we will be sharing together.

My first thought is... does this ridiculous legal document govern every damn aspect of my existence?

My second thought is... part of the joy of marriage is heaping all your belongings on the same little wagon and pulling them along together. Is the lawyer who wrote this agreement seven years ago going to tell me that can't be done?

My third thought is... it's the spirit of the law, not the letter. There must be some way to make this arrangement fairer to my future spouse. He is going to be paying half the mortgage, after all.

I realize some unsavory precedent must have instigated this cynical clause. Some situation where a TIC partner married a destitute werewolf and disrupted the peaceful co-existence and financial stability of the sacred circle of owners. But this isn't that kind of situation. We are both upstanding middle-aged citizens. And my fiance is, actually, better off than I am.

What a thing to tell your beloved. Sorry, darling, you're out - my building partners take precedence.

This requires further investigation. And research. And possible consultation with the Juris Doctor author of the offending clause. Stay tuned.


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